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Why I need a wife…

I came to a realization this week.  It was prompted by a back log of laundry, the quantity of dog hair lurking in the carpet and the lack of anything resembling a nutritious meal in the fridge.  I need a wife.  Or maybe a personal assistant.  Clearly I am not juggling all of the tasks on the home front as well as I should be.

I have two part-time ministry calls.  One is to a small church as their part-time interim pastor and the other is as a part-time instructor in theology and ethics at a nearby seminary.  Note that both of these employment settings use the word part-time.  But if you’ve spent any time in the real world of ministry you will know that part-time is rarely part-time.  When the work load at the seminary is at its normal level and we’re not in a season of special liturgical significance in the church the work load is quite manageable.  But when both settings require just a little more than part-time chaos begins to set in and the place that it settles is home.

I have to confess that I envy my colleagues in both ministry settings who have “stay at home” spouses.  They can depend on someone else to buy food and make meals, wash, fold and put away laundry, and stay on top of the dog hair.  I usually try to cram those tasks into the spaces between ministry appointments, meetings, study time, sermon prep and grading papers.

Which leads me to this week’s epiphany.  I’m perfectly content with my husband of 27 years and have no desire to trade him in.  But he works equally as many hours a week as I do, sometimes including weekends.  He is willing to tackle some of the aforementioned tasks but his time is as limited as mine.  What I need, what we need, is a wife.  Or a house-husband.  Preferably someone who works for free inexpensively and doesn’t mind a position with an chaotic irregular work schedule.  I wonder if I should post an ad on Craig’s list?

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